Monday 21 November 2011

Driving and Paris

(Twice in one week, don't you feel loved? I wouldn't get used to it just yet. Things are bound to get manic again soon.)

I don't know what the road accident rate is like in Paris. I assume pretty high. (I'd look it up, but, well, I've had 3 hours sleep and I'm not really feeling like doing any actual research right now. I'm sure you'll cope.)

It is, however, a miracle that it isn't higher. Today I have nearly been run over by 2 motorbikes and 1 car, and I was on the pavement each time. This is largely because motorbikes - and bicycles, for that matter - don't seem to make a difference between such concepts as "road" and "pavement", except that the latter usually has less vehicles on it, so you can drive faster.

The car, in a staggering display of logic combined with inspiration, decided that while the one-way system was important enough to respect, it couldn't apply if you reversed up the road. So, on reaching a crossroads near my house and finding he couldn't turn left like he wanted, he turned right, driving over the curb and nearly hitting me standing on the pavement near the zebra crossing and then proceeded to reverse up the one-way street at full speed. This, naturally, couldn't possibly cause any accidents or even vaguely infringe on the law, because his car was facing the right direction.

I weep for humanity.

Sunday 20 November 2011

Europe, the EU and the Eurozone...

(Hello. It's been a while, hasn't it? I'll try to fill you in later, in case anyone's around still who cares...)

Today, though, I would like to be all pedagogic and explain something that I've seen being conflated repeatedly. (Not by any of you, remaining devoted readers, who are obviously brilliant. But others.)

Europe is the continent. It includes all the countries on the continent. It sometimes includes Turkey and usually includes Russia. (For Eurovision purposes, it seems to also include Israel, but that's clearly an unusual definition. Ignore it.) Notwithstanding the presence of sea, I would also include countries like the UK, Ireland and Iceland as part of Europe. (I realise those well-versed in geography might disagree. But they've probably had a nervous breakdown at my total inability to comprehend geography by now and left, so I'm comfortable saying the UK is part of Europe.)

The EU is the European Union. It has 27 member states. These are all part of Europe (per my happy and inclusive definition above, anyway) - but not all countries in Europe are part of the EU. (I'm half planning a lengthy explanation of the EU and its institutions at some point. If I haven't managed to bore everyone around me to death by then, that should finish everyone off.)

The Eurozone (or Euro Area as its also known) is made up of 17 of the EU countries. All the countries in the Eurozone are part of the EU, but not all EU countries are part of the Eurozone. Notable examples of EU countries that aren't in the EU are the UK and Denmark. Greece still is, at least at the time of writing.

I am now confident that this is clear to all, and expect to see no more confusion of these terms. Anywhere. By anyone. Because Google can direct them here and then they can understand all...